After Weimar It All Fell Apart

​Nine FACTS, One LIE
Issue TWO

1. Hey, so let's talk about Nazis and the people who continue to love them. So, really, let's talk about Elon. But first, did you know Fred Trump (formerly Drumpf, sort of like changing your name from Cherilyn Sarkisian to Cher) was arrested in Queens in 1926, one of 7 men busted for "brawling" with anti-fascist protestors at a KKK rally? Of course that's all fake news/hoax/lamestream bleating, except when you take 12 seconds to Goog the NY Times article published the following day, in which Fred features prominently.

2. When first running in 2016, Donald was asked about the incident by a Daily Mail reporter. Here is his verbatim response:

"He was never arrested. He has nothing to do with this. This never happened. This is nonsense and it never happened. Never took place. He was never arrested, never convicted. It’s a completely false, ridiculous story. He was never there. It never happened. Never took place.”

Got it.

3. Aside from the multi-podium Hitlerian salutes Elon Musk has wowed supporters with, and subsequent denials/interpretations of what such salutes actually mean to Elon, let alone what they serve to communicate, it's hard to deny that the familiar chest pump, flat hand, palm downward, straight thumb components are identical in both gestures, and EXACTLY what's required for entrance into Club Goebbels while waiting behind the velvet rope at midnight. On March 14th, Elon did tweet "Stalin, Mao, and Hitler didn’t murder millions of people. Their public sector employees did." Which, even if you LOVE the turn radius of your Cybertruck, let alone all the great work DOGE is doing, is a tough sentiment to delete away.

4. Elon's grandparents are actually Canadian. His grandfather, Joshua Haldeman, was head of the Canadian branch of Technocracies Incorporated, a proto-Fascist movement to replace democracies around the world with technocratic rule. Really! Yeah, you can't write this stuff. Apparently you can't report it, either. Anyway, in the 30's Tech Inc developed an all-gray uniform based on early Nazi costumery, and in 1939, when Canada declared war on Germany, the group was banned and Haldeman arrested for Nazi sympathies. After not nearly enough time in jail and upon release, he moved the family to downtown Detroit. Actually, that's not true, they fled to South Africa, home of the peanut butter and jelly mix of ex-pat Nazis + Apartheid! Likely just a coincidence.

5. And much like spending 200 million of his own cash to get Donald Trump elected, Elon swung his Odd Arm Gestures and plenty of Bitcoin behind the ultra fascist Alternative für Deutschland, everyone's (Hess, Goering, Gabbard's) favorite party in the recent German election. Addressing them via Zoom from Baron Trump's race car bunkbeds, Elon said "It's good to be proud of German culture and German values, and not to lose that in some sort of multiculturalism that dilutes everything. Frankly there's too much of a focus on past guilt and we need to move beyond that. Children should not be guilty of the sins of their parents, let alone their parents, their great-grandparents."
The AFD's broke out in wild applause, even though it was manifestly unclear what his coded language referred too. What guilt? Who again? Wait, wasn't Operation Barbarossa the opening act at the last Fyre Festival?

6. Look out for coming issues of NF, One L, where we will dive deep into Apartheid Emeralds and chin implant surgery + just the kind of hairline reconstruction only a billion dollars can buy.

7. Finally, as long as we're talking about the transitions of Popes old and new, worth remembering the impenetrable, glacial silence of Pius XII during one of the least-Christian eras of human history, who had regular secret back-channel negotiations with Hitler (sort of like when Trump met Putin in the White House, no notes taken), who was otherwise busy re-assuring the world he was not on the verge of invading Poland. Then he invaded Poland. These Vatican/Reich negotiations no doubt covered a myriad of topics, possibly one being the price of muteness on the world stage due to grounds of "neutrality", sort of like what Jesus worked out with Pontius Pilate. Yeah, Pope Pius XXII even said nothing while thousands of Jews were rounded up in ROME, from right beneath the papal skirts, and sent to Auschwitz. Sure, it's a bad look now, and tough to explain in 2025, but just as children should not be guilty of the sins of their parents, neither should popes.

8. Pete Hegseth is covered with Nazi chest tattoos. You can view their symbology online. Stephen Miller tried to join Aryan Nation but was rejected, even tier bosses saying he was "too creepy", and so signed up for a "I Look Like Nosferatu, Too!" cosplay club instead.

9. Parasites in flag pins, this government, this ship of irredeemable fools.